Birthdays bring up crazy thoughts sometimes. This year for me was full of emotions. I was happy, sad, excited, reflective, angry, and grateful. Not exactly sure where all of the emotions are coming from until I stepped back and reflected a bit regarding the past 12 months…
It’s been a challenging year in more ways than one. My parents health is diminishing, my industry is waivering on the edge of “a different type of 2008, “ learning about and maneuvering around Greig’s illness, and other “life” challenges. Through the challenges I also became a Grammie again twice! My youngest became engaged to the love of her life, another wedding soon, and Greig and I are still merging two households into one which is no easy feat. There’s been a crap load of crazy things in 2023!
Yet, 2023 gave me the epiphany for “birthday resolutions” instead of New Year’s resolutions…
Over the past 45 years I sucked at keeping New Year’s resolutions so I came up with a few Birthday resolutions! Plural also, so my odds are better in keeping at least one….
Birthday Resolution Number 1-
Try something out of my comfort zone… yes guys! Something I have been wanting to throw my hat in the ring for is on-line e-commerce. I’ve held back because I ask myself what do I have to offer? Silly right? All of us have something to offer to one another. I think we live in fear of what others will say if we want to try something new or different. Well, I’m going to give myself permission to expand my blog, add a little empowering storefront, and write more.
Actually, I believe it might be a lot of fun to try out different products and report back to you how it’s going. Many of you reached out to me after I’ve written a certain blog and related! I always love everyone’s feedback and pointers. The positivity of ISwearYouGotThisGirl has been so much fun!
Birthday Resolution Number 2-
Clear out crap…Merging minimalism (him) and stuff (me)….Well, love does have a sense of humor.
So, most of you know the back story not my move to the beach. With this I am STILL donating or throwing away physical things. I have cocktail dresses from years ago that “I might wear again.” No! For one my big butt won’t fit in it and I can not stand stuffy get togethers any longer! I have 3 closets full of clothes I do not even touch so it’s time to donate, AGAIN! This includes a china hutch that is too big for my tiny cottage, college papers I’ve written, bank statements from 15 years ago. I think you get the point! But, I finally figured out why I procrastinate regarding things I need to get rid of. It’s painful. Which brings me to Number 3.
Birthday Resolution Number 3-
Face what is painful…
Clearing out boxes that were packed during the most traumatic time of my life has been one of the most difficult tasks I have ever faced. Just writing about it makes me cry. As I sit here I cry. Why? Because it’s a reminder of where I was and where I am now. I lost myself. I lost new friends and childhood friends after I married that I would turn to for support. I felt so alone even in a world full of people. My children saved me during those times but even to this day, I’m definitely still healing.
It’s painful to open a box that was packed with my kids baby books or old photographs. It’s painful to see where I was. I never kept up on milestones and even basic photo albums. It’s not that I didn’t care. My depression was pretty bad and I masked everything to make it through some weeks. This wasn’t all the time but it was quite prevalent years ago and still I have times that I feel so scrambled I give up. The difference is I recognize it now. I’m slowly facing the fear of unpacked boxes and paperwork. I will do it. You can too.
Birthday Resolution Number 4-
It’s okay to ask for help and to set boundaries…
I know we hear that phrase all of the time but rarely do any of us ask for help or set boundaries. Most of us are at a time in our lives where our parents need extra help, our kids are having kids, and grand babies need our attention. Let’s be real, we can’t get enough of those babies! I couldn’t be luckier but it is a lot to juggle. My sister and I use to have most of the responsibility regarding our parents. Eventually our brothers really got involved and later we had the family pow wow to bring in a few hours of care taking each day. One of my sayings is “I wish there were three of me.” That way I could be everything for everyone. Guess what? Not possible. You will kill yourself trying. Sometimes you have to say no to protect your mind and body. Taking care of me is work in progress. Maybe this birthday resolution will make me a better woman all around.
Birthday Resolutions may not be for everyone but at least it gives me a few guidelines or goals. Goodbye 2023! 2024 is going to be a fun one!
Thank you my beautiful kids for an amazing boat ride, my friends and family for my birthday wishes, and to Greig for my day at the salon. I feel loved and appreciated: )