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In The End

Updated: May 2, 2019

I'm actually not sure how to even start this Blog of mine and why I even think anyone would read it! To be honest, as a little girl I dreamed of being a veterinarian or a writer of some type. Thinking back I thought Vets took care of dogs by playing with them and nursing them back to health in some way. I didn't know they were actually doctors? Blood and all! yuk! The writer thing? Well, it was an escape for me when I was told I was horrible in Algebra in 8th grade. My 8th grade teacher Mr. Lenz, who wore shiny suits and a hook of nose hairs growing from his nostrils put me in my place after asking in front of everyone in class "Why are numbers and letters being put together in math?" The class giggled and he openly called me stupid. Yep, I hated math after that and I put my energy into the ARTS like "girls back then were supposed to do." I loved writing. Thank goodness I loved it because my 8th grade teacher single handedly squashed my progress in excelling in the sciences and pushed me to find peace in English and Social Studies. I could express myself there. Expressing things I couldn't openly to anyone. I was a closet author. Years passed. Three grown daughters later, a gorgeous grandson, and a horrible divorce after 23 years, I would write. Or try to. It’s never too late right? To go after that dream? Like most Moms, our dreams and needs are put aside to be the glue that holds a family together. Especially the life I married into. My ex-husband worked hard and followed his dream and became a professional baseball player, my daughters were and still are Division 1 athletes on scholarships and graduated and en-route to graduate. Productive members of society and strong women. Me? I was and still am a good mom. I know I did that right in my life. But I wasn't prepared for a failed marriage, to not know who I was, to not be self supportive. A ton of "nots." I was scared to death. I AM still afraid. But, I won't give up. I swear I got this! Hence the name of my blog. I relate to different songs now and again that I listen to. One is by Linkin Park. "In The End." Part of the lyrics say "you wouldn't recognize me anymore, not that you knew me back then." In the end it doesn't even matter... Be true to who you are. Don't change who you are for someone else because in the end it can almost kill you. So, here it goes. This closet author is coming out! A bit of fact, fiction, a bit of everything! Enjoy!

#writing #ISwearYouGotThisGirl #betruetoyou #dreams #chickover50 #positivity #dating #travel #sports #helpingothers #healing


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